Rachel Uchitel, the first of many women to say she slept with Tiger Woods, is pregnant. How could you knock someone up that you only know exists because she tried to get famous for banging a married man?
Lindsay Lohan is not going to go out and party for New Year’s. Which I translate to “She got enough drugs from that trip to Hawaii that she wont even be able to recognize her front door so its better she get stoned at home.”
There are rumors that Maria Shriver, due to religious reasons, may be changing her mind over divorcing Arnold Schwarzenegger. “I’ll be back…” he probably said to an empty hotel room while surrounded by cheeseburgers.
Some chick got rapper/robot singer Drake’s name tattooed in big ass letters across her forehead. This is why it pays to have friends. They don’t let you do dumb shit like this.
Former NFL player Deion Sanders is divorcing his wife. News she would’ve liked to have discovered in person, not on TMZ.
Ali Lohan turned 18 recently. “Tonight…we’re getting FUCKED UP!!!” her entire family likely shouted at her.
Sinead O’Connor who recently married for the fourth time is already splitting up after 18 days. So soon?
The Kardashian’s are being accused of using sweatshops to manufacture their clothing line. I believed this story immediately. Why? Because I think that entire family is evil.
PETA is mad at Janet Jackson for wearing a fur coat which means that she rules ass for pissing off people that need better hobbies.
Singer John Legend proposed to his model girlfriend Chrissy Teigen. Don’t worry, ladies. He’s an R&B singer which means he’ll hit her any moment now and she’s a model which means once she gains an ounce she’ll lose her mind and attack him.
And for no reason Katy Perry!
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